Much Ado About Nalu
by ijustcanteven
Summary: Natsu is having a hard time finding his courage to ask out Lucy and his Guild Mates really aren't helping. Who will Lucy say yes too? Laxus? Gray? Loke? or Cana? Will Natsu ever find his way to ask her? No real time setting, just for shits and giggles. Many cursing.
1. Chapter 1

**Ok, so this fic I'm really excited about. In my opinion, it's fucking highlarious and I had an absolute blast writing it. I ship Graylu but my opt is Nalu, so I thought wouldn't it be wonderful to tease Graylu then have Nalu punch it in the face? Yes. Yes, it would. So it started out like that, just the two boys fighting and starting a disaster... then I ran with my imagination and more people got involved. Becuase in Fairy Tail, everyone gets involved in everyone's business. No real time setting. Just meant to be funny and shit.**

 **The exceeds are away on a mission with Wendy. I forgot to weave that in while I was writing, always saying I'd add it on the next page, so there, now ya now.**

"Do it."

"What? No!"

"You scared Flame Brain?"

"Lay off Ice Stripper!"

"What are you two arguing about now?" Lucy said coming up to Natsu and Gray who were eating lunch at the bar.

"Nothing!" Natsu said quickly.

Gray smirked at him. "Yeah, nothing important, don't worry about it, Lucy."

But Lucy would worry. It wasn't like the two of them to keep something from her, let alone get along well enough to. "What are you two planning?"

"Lucy, you know us, could we possibly plan something without it blowing up in our faces?" Gray asked.

Lucy smiled. "You guys are right! I'm going back to Erza and Levy. Have fun planning!"

"Well, that was slightly insulting," Gray said as they watched her walk away.

"I'm still not doing it," Natsu said turning to his lunch.

"You _are_ scared aren't you?" Gray snickered.

"Shut up will ya? I said I'm not scared so I'm not afraid got it?" Natsu yelled at him.

"Are we talking about how Natsu is scared to ask out Lucy?" Loke asked.

"When the hell did you get here?" Natsu yelled.

"Sometimes I miss the Guild, no matter how incredible the Spirit World is, there is nothing like getting into a Guild Brawl," Loke smiled. "Or talking with old friends."

"Yeah well, we aren't talking about that," Natsu grumbled.

"Yes, we are," Gray smiled.

"NO WE AREN'T!"

"Are we talking about how Natsu is too much of a puss to ask out Lucy?" Laxus said coming up beside Gray.

"Yup."

"DOES THE WHOLE DAMN GUILD KNOW?" Natsu roared.

"Everyone but Lucy," Laxus answered.

"We think," Gray added.

"Either she doesn't know, or she does, and she's playing dumb," Loke finished.

"I'M NOT DOING IT SO THE THREE OF YA CAN JUST LAY OFF!" Natsu yelled.

"Lay off of what?" Cana asked with a full bottle of beer.

"Nothing," Natsu snapped.

"Ohh, Natsu being a chicken bitch and not asking out Lucy," Cana nodded.

"WHAT DID YOU JUST CALLED ME!"

"Yup," Gray nodded. "I said he could just do it. What's the worst that could happen?"

"What's the worst that could happen? What's the worst that could happen? I'll tell you the worst that could happen!" Natsu yelled.

 _"So, Lucy, do you wanna go out on a date with me?"_

 _"WHAT? A DATE WITH YOU? AH HA HA HA HA HA HA NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS NATSU! YOU'RE AN IDIOT MAN CHILD! AH HA HA HA HA HA! EVERYONE! EVERYONE! YOU HAVE TO HEAR WHAT NATSU JUST ASKED ME!"_

"And then she tells the entire Guild and then the Guild tells the rest of Earthland and I'm forced to leave and live in a cave. Oh, and Happy decides to stay with Lucy." Natsu finished.

The four of them stood blinking at him.

"I have to give it to him," Laxus nodded. "We asked for the worst, and he delivered. That is the worst thing that could happen."

Gray shook his head. "You know that would never happen right?"

"Lucy isn't the type of girl to do something like," Loke nodded.

"Yeah, if anyone is it's me," Cana nodded. "Definitely not her, what would happen is this..."

 _"So Lucy, do you wanna go out on a date with me?"_

 _"I..." Lucy a blush the color of Erza's face quickly crawled up her face. "I..." Her knees began to shake, and sweat broke out._

 _"Are you okay Lucy?" Natsu asked._

 _"I'd love too..." With that, she collapsed to the floor as her ghost left her body._

"Then he revives her, and they go out on a date and get married and have many annoying children," Cana nodded.

The four blinked at her.

"More likely," Laxus nodded.

"A little over exaggerated but I could see it," Gray nodded as well.

"Very over exaggerated," Loke added.

"There is no way she would say yes!" Natsu yelled blushing. "And there is no way we would have a bunch of babies, let alone get married."

"Oh, so you only want one or two?" Laxus asked.

"IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT I WANT IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN!"

"Buuuut?" Gray asked.

"Yeah," Natsu grumbled.

"Knew it."

"Can I add another worse case?" Loke asked smirking.

"Oh yeah, please do..." Natsu deadpanned.

 _"Lucy, do you wanna go out on a date with me?"_

 _"OPEN GATE OF LEO THE LIONHEARTED!"_

 _"You have dishonored Princess Lucy!" Loke yelled._

"Then I beat the shit outta you and Lucy, and I get married." Loke finished.

Laxus nodded thoughtfully. "Okay, less likely than Cana's. More likely than Natsu's."

Natsu stared at him confused and angry.

"Don't worry Natsu," Laxus smiled. "That's never happening. This is what would happen."

 _"So, Lucy ya wanna go on a date with me?"_

 _"LUCY KICK!"_

"Then she ignores you for the rest of her life. Oh and Happy _does_ decide to stay with her." Laxus answered.

Natsu was hitting his head on the table. "This has all made everything so much worse..."

"No no," Gray said. "This is what would happen..."

 _"So, Lucy, let's go on a date together, my treat!"_

 _Lucy's lips wiggle trying to hold back her sobbing as her face turns blue._

 _"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO MAKE LUCY CRY? I'LL END YOU!"_

"Then Erza beats you to death," Gray concluded.

Laxus nodded. "She does treat Lucy like a little sister. I can see that happening."

"I hate you all," Natsu mumbled.

"How about we make a deal," Loke said. "The four of us each will ask her out."

"WHAT? WHAT TYPE OF A DEAL IS THAT?" Natsu yelled.

"One," Gray said. "Each of us asking her out, you'll see it can't be that bad to ask her yourself. Either to see what happens when she says no, or find out she didn't like you anyway."

"Two," Laxus smiled. "She'll be going on dates with us three, so you'll have to act fast before one of us gets her first."

"Four," Cana corrected.

They all stared at her.

"What? Ya know I go both ways so why not at least try," She shrugged. "Wheres Mira? I'm dying of thirst!"

"Alright fine, the four of us," Gray clarified. "And I haven't seen her for a while."

"You wouldn't dare," Natsu said glaring.

"Ya got one week before we start," Loke answered.

With that, Natsu stormed off with steam following.


	2. Chapter 2

**So this is the second posting of the chapter. The first time I posted this it went all screwy with formatting. I got the message this moring and looked at it on my phone and it was all in weird code. So I don't know if it was a mobel only issue or on all thing but hopefully it will work out now.**

The week came and went with Natsu pussing out every day.

The first day, he brought her flowers, then quickly burned them to ash before she turned around to see them.

The second day, he bought her chocolates in a heart shaped box. Then stress ate them before she even got to the Guild.

The third day, he bought her a simple bracelet. Which he then force-fed it to Gajeel which erupted into a Guild Brawl.

The fourth day, he didn't even go to the Guild. It was a _long_ three days, and he needed a break.

The fifth day, he was stupid enough to listen to Mira's suggestion and wrote her a poem. He then quickly ate it when Lucy came up behind him.

The sixth day he sat at the bar occasionally beating his head against it.

The seventh day, he paid for Lucy's food for the entire week because he kept buying her meals as a way to get her to ignore how weird he was acting.

"I feel embarrassed for him," Cana said at a table with the other three.

"Yeah," Gray nodded. "Sure as hell has been funny to watch, though."

"And we did have a good brawl when he force-fed Gajeel," Loke added.

"So I guess we start tomorrow?" Laxus asked.

"Yeah," Gray nodded. "Who's first?"

"I'll go," Loke volunteered. "I know she'll say no to me. It's against the rules for us, and I'm already seeing someone."

"Will the girl you're seeing mind?" Cana asked. "We wanna start trouble for Natsu, not you."

"I already talked to Aries and explained it. She's understands," He smiled. "When everyone is sitting together for lunch I'll come in with some flowers, ask her and then go back to the Spirit World. It'll be fun."

"Don't let us down," Cana said.

"You have to make him jealous," Gray said.

"I wanna see flames coming from him," Laxus added.

"I'll put my all into it," He nodded. "Just wait."

~~~

The next day came, and everyone sat together for lunch. Lucy on the outside most seat of the bench with Erza next to her. Natsu sat across from her while Gajeel, Levy, Laxus, Cana, Gray and Juvia all squished in to 'catch up' and 'spend time with their Guild mates they don't see a lot.'

"Lyon asked Juvia for dinner tomorrow," Juvia said telling her tale of the day. "But she doesn't know if Juvia should say yes or not."

"HE ISN'T EVEN IN OUR GUILD!" Gray reasoned rather loudly.

"I think Juvia should say yes," Natsu said smirking at Gray. "I mean, you're entirely single, right? Why waste time on someone that may never happen?"

Lucy sighed into her salad, and Erza patted her shoulder.

*** LAST WEEK IN THE GUILD ***

 _"They aren't doing anything too dangerous," Lucy said sitting back down with Erza and Levy. "Just coming up with some half-cocked plan."_

 _"So, what were we talking about?" Erza asked._

 _"Natsu and Lucy," Levy smiled._

 _"Again?" Juvia asked, crawling out from under the table. "Juvia loves this topic."_

 _"N-no, we weren't talking about us at all!" Lucy said holding up her hands a bead of sweat dropped from her head._

 _"Oh right, the lack of Natsu and Lucy," Levy giggled._

 _"Why won't you three leave me alone?" Lucy asked exasperated._

 _"You really do like him, Lucy?" Juvia asked._

 _Lucy sighed. "Yes, I still do," She glanced over to see said dragon slayer yelling at Loke, Gray, and Laxus. Wait Loke? Oh well, he must have been there on his own magic, she'd let him be. "But... he has no interest in me, at least not like that."_

 _The three girlfriends exchanged a look. "Are you sure, Lucy?" Erza asked._

 _Again Lucy sighed. "Yeah, no matter how much I might like him... he just... will never feel the same. He just thinks of me as his partner. I'm basically another Happy to him."_

 _The girls exchanged another look; Juvia was about to say something when Erza shook her head. "Do you want me to beat him up?"_

 _Lucy smiled slightly. "No, it isn't his fault I'm so... undesirable. You guys don't understand. I just wish he'd-"_

 _"Bring you flowers?" Juvia finished looking sadly at Gray._

 _"Buy you chocolates?" Erza asked thinking of Jellal._

 _"Bring you a cute bracelet?" Levy asked wistfully looking at Gajeel._

 _"Write you a poem?" Mira said handing them refills while looking at Cana._

 _"Notice me as a female," Lucy finished, looking longingly at Natsu as he hit his head on the bar._

 _The girls all sighed saying "Yeah," Looking at who they all wished for._

 _Erza slammed her fist down on the table and stood up. "This is insane! We are warriors and mages in the Fairy Tail Guild. We don't need a man-"_

 _"Or woman." Mira sighed._

 _"Or woman to be happy!" Erza yelled._

 _"Yeah!" They all agreed._

 _"We are strong independent women who don't need a man or a woman to be happy!" Levy yelled standing up._

 _"Sure would be nice to have one, though," Juvia said._

 _"Let's go train!" Lucy yelled. "I wanna punch something!"_

 _"Yeah!" They all agreed charging out of the Guild House._

*** END ***

"Then Juvia will think more about agreeing," Juvia nodded.

Gray leaned closer to his two accomplices. "I no longer have any regrets about how he may feel about this."

"LUCY!" Loke yelled appearing out of nowhere with a bouquet of pink roses looking more than dashing in his suit.

"Eh? Loke? What are you doing here, with flowers?" She asked.

"For you," He smiled irresistibly to her. "I was wondering if you would want to go out on a dinner date with me tonight."

Natsu shot daggers at the spirit then turned angrily to his lunch, shooting another glare down to the other three as they tried to hold back smiles.

Lucy glanced quickly to Natsu, who was eating his lunch like nothing in the world mattered or anything strange was happening. Maybe she should follow his advice, not to waste her time on something that would never happen. Maybe she should say yes. Wait! Damnit, she couldn't even if she did want to. A Celestial Mage couldn't date a Spirit.

"Ah, thank you, Loke-"

"The flowers are your favorite right?" He smiled down. He knew the were.

"Um, yes," She said accepting them as he handed them to her. "Thank you, but I can't say yes. You know it's against the rules for a Mage to date a spirit. I'm sorry. Thank you, though, it's very sweet."

Loke smirked then put on a saddened face. "Yes, my beautiful Lucy, I know the rules. I figured it was worth a shot, however. I wish I would have asked you when I was still human." With that, he vanished back to his world.

"Wow..." Lucy said still stunned.

"LOKE JUST ASKED YOU OUT, AND YOU SAID NO?" Levy yelled. "ARE YOU STUPID?"

Lucy blinked. "Even if I wanted to say yes I couldn't have. Spirits can't date humans."

"Why's it matters Shrimp," Gajeel sneered. "It's just some guy."

She cut him a glare. "Some girls like to be asked out."

"Yeah, I'm... I'm just gonna go home today." Lucy said.

"I'll come with," Levy said sending Gajeel another glare.

"Juvia will as well," She said standing up and flipping her hair at Gray.

"I'd like to join as well," Mira said throwing her tray on the table and following.

"We should get some vodka," Erza said following.

Everyone watched them leave confused.

"Did we piss them off somehow?" Gray asked.

"Probably," Cana shrugged.

Gajeel watched Natsu stewing. "Annoyed that other people like your Bunny Girl, Fire Breath?"

"Shove it Gajeel," Natsu said in a final tone.

"Ya got two days," Gray smiled as Natsu punched his fist in the table then stormed out.

Cana leaned forward looking at Gajeel. "Ya know, I think Natsu is gonna ask Lucy out soon. It'd be a shame if he beat you to getting a girlfriend."

Gajeel sneered at her then stood and walked out of the Guild.

"What was that?" Laxus asked.

"Had to help a friend out," She shrugged. "So Laxus, what do you think of Freed?"

"What?"

"Please," Gray snickered. "Freed is your Juvia."

"And about Juvia, when are you gonna ask her out?" Laxus asked.

Gray blushed. "When Cana asks out Mira!"

Mira spit her beer out. "Alright, we seem to be getting a little heated. Why don't we focus on who is gonna ask Luce out in two days?"

Laxus sighed. "I will, just... don't... don't tell Freed..."


	3. Chapter 3

**Wow third one already? I'll be honest, I already have the story finished on my computer and I'm posting as I edit. Someone has a suspicious mind!**

The following day Lucy stayed home, much to the annoyance of a certain Fire Breather.

The second day, his last day to ask her out before Laxus would, went something like this.

"Lucy?"

"Yeah, Natsu?"

"... never mind..."

"Lucy?"

"Yeah, Natsu?"

"What are you doing tonight?"

"Oh? Uh, nothing why?"

"I... no reason I was just wondering."

"Yo, Luce?"

"Yes, Natsu?"

"I was wondering if you would like... if you wanna WATCH ME PUNCH GRAY IN HIS STUPID FACE! GRAY, GET YOUR NAKED ASS OVER HERE!"

That is how the _entire_ day went.

So the next day Natsu was sure to get to the Guild early. He looked around wearily. Cana was sitting by herself with empty mugs around her table. Gajeel was talking with Levy. Gray was trying to pry Juvia off of him. Erza sharpening her sword and Mira was cleaning some glasses. Leaving Lucy alone reading at the bar.

Natsu took two deep sniffs of the room. Laxus was in the back with Markov, meaning he would probably stay there all day and Loke wasn't even on their plain. Perfect.

He walked confidently over to Lucy and then leaned against the bar facing her. "Hey Luce, it's been awhile since we've had a mission I... was.. wondering... if.." He faltered out as a large shadow came looming over him. Lucy was no longer looking at him and instead was looking up at the creature of the shadow with a worried face.

A hand clamped down on Natsu's head. "Awe," He was picked up off his feet and thrown across the Guild. "CRAAAAP!"

"So," Laxus smiled taking Natsu's place. "How you doin'?"

On the other side of the Guild Natsu popped up, pushing the broken wood from his impact to the side as he watched Laxus stand over Lucy.

"Hmm," Gray smirked while holding Juvia at arm's length. "I wonder what Laxus wants from Lucy."

"Um..." Lucy felt a nervous blush spread across her face. "F-fine, thank you. And you?"

"Better since I saw you," He said sending her a toothy grin spiking everyone's interest in the Guild making a hush fall.

"Oh, uh, good," Lucy smiled trying to stand up.

"Hey, where you going blondie?" Laxus said putting a hand on her waist, faintly aware of a sudden burst of fire from the other side of the Guild.

Makarov stood on the far end of the bar. "Ah, it's about time Laxus started showing an interest in girls!"

"Uh, actually, Natsu and I were just about ready to go on a mission. RIGHT NATSU-"

"It seems Natsu is a bit busy, why don't you go to dinner with me instead?" Laxus asked.

"Um..."

"She can't," Erza said coming up to her side. "We're having a girls night tonight, right?"

"Yeah," Levy and Juvia quickly smiled.

"R-right!" Lucy smiled.

"Didn't you have one last week too?" Laxus asked.

"Just because you're the Master's' grandson, doesn't mean you get to know what we do in our free time, Laxus." Mira smiled brightly.

"Why not lunch then?" He said ignoring the girls and leaning in closer to Lucy. "Now?"

"Why don't you ask Freed instead, Laxus?" Levy smiled going and putting an arm around Lucy. "Lucy and I are going to a meet and greet of an author we both love in a few minutes."

Laxus sent her a look as sparks light up in his hair. "Hey, it's okay, some other time, right Lucy?"

"Uh... y-yeah... maybe..." Lucy smiled. "But for now, Levy and I really gotta get going!"

Just like Lucy ran out of the Guild pulling Levy behind her.

Laxus walked to where Cana, Loke, and Gray sat getting pats on his back the entire way.

"Well, that went well," He said sarcastically sitting down.

Natsu walked up to the table as they laughed and slammed his fists down, silencing them. " _Never_ , touch her _again_!" He ordered before storming out of the Guild.

"So," Laxus said after a second. "Who's going next?"

"I will," Cana said downing her drink. "She deserves a break from guys."

"I think you almost gave her a heart attack Laxus," Gray laughed.

"I actually came here because I sensed Miss. Lucy was panicking rather considerably," Loke said nodding from his seat. "Taurus almost came with me."

"Well, I'm willing to bet the same will happen next time too," Gray smirked.

"Just what are you four talking about?" Mira asked sitting drinks down in front of everyone.

"Oh, nothing," Gray said innocently.

"Really? You four don't typically hang out together," Mira said just as kindly.

"Mirajane, what is the problem with four Guild Mates sitting together talking?" Loke laughed.

Mira smiled again. "Nothing of course. But half of the group has asked a particular Celestial Mage out in less than a week-"

"Are you saying we came up with some plan?" Cana asked sounding more than offended.

"Yeah, Mira, that's just silly," Loke smirked. "What would the goal even be?"

"Yeah, probably something stupid, like trying to get Natsu to ask out Lucy," Laxus snorted.

"Yeah, if you haven't noticed, a third of this table is constantly annoyed by him, why would we want to help him anyway?" Gray finished.

"Can't a guy just like a girl?" Laxus asked.

"Yes," Loke added. "What a suspicious mind you have Mirajane."

Mira giggled and smiled as innocently and sweetly as she ever had before. "I don't really care if anything happens to Natsu right now, but if any of you manage to hurt or embarrass our dear Lucy, you'll be dealing with Satan Soul, do you understand?"

The four gulped. "Yes, we know."

"Good! Anything more I can get for you guys?"

"No, we're good thanks," Loke answered.

"Mira," Gray called as she started to walk away. "You won't say anything?"

"About what?" She asked smiling then turned to walk away.


	4. Chapter 4

**This one is short, I know... but GAY! Well, a little bit of gay and that's all that matters!**

The next day neither Lucy or Natsu came into the Guild.

The second day, Lucy didn't show up again, and Natsu sulked in a corner by himself. He had tried to go to her house to make sure she was okay, but once she assured him she was, Lucy immediately kicked him out.

The third day, the table of four were actually considering to all go and apologize to Lucy and come clean when she came in for dinner.

She came in by herself and sat in the middle of the last empty table. Erza quickly went to her side pulling out a piece of paper to show her as Juvia and Levi sat down. Mira just continued to serve; she had heard nothing but Erza talking about that paper all damn day.

"It's from Jellal," She said excitedly. "He said he will be near the town in two weeks and would love to see me. He even suggested we get dinner!"

"I'm so happy for you!" Lucy said smiling.

"Juvia is as well!"

"We need to all go shopping so we can get you a dress to wear!" Levy squealed.

"A dress for Erza?" Natsu asked as he and Gray joined them.

"Erza, you know you can't battle in those right?" Gray snickered.

She had his head under her boot in less than a second, emanating a dark aura. "Contrary to popular belief, I _am_ a woman!"

Gray twitched under her foot. "You're right, you're right! I'm sorry!"

She sighed sitting back down as Gray crawled back into his seat.

"Hey, Lucy," Cana said coming up behind them and pushing Levy to the side so she could sit next to Lucy. "Hows t goin'?"

"Uh, good," Lucy said holding her nose. "How many drinks have you had?"

"Today?" Cana asked. "I dunno, lost track round hundred. Hey, you - you're hot, you wanna go out with me tomorrow?"

"What?" Lucy asked blushing.

"A daaaaate," Cana smiled.

Mira dropped her tray breaking all the plates on it; everyone looked to her. "Oh, clumsy me!"

"Anyway, what do ya say Lushy?" Cana asked.

"Uh, well, I don't like girls that way, and even if I did, you're drunk," Lucy said pushing her gently off of her.

"So?"

"So, I don't think you're gonna remember this in the morning," Lucy smiled.

Cana shrugged and stood up. "What about you Mira? You wanna go out?"

Mira shot up with a shocked face, after a moment gaining her composure and smiled. "Ask me again when you're sober."

"Really?" Cana smirked, walking after her.

"Lucy?" Levi asked. "How do you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Get three people to ask you out in a week when I can't get one in a year?" Levi asked.

Lucy shook her head. "Loke used to ask me out once a week. I think Laxus lost a bet and Cana is just drunk off her butt." She reasoned.

"Still," Juvia said. "You have had a good week, Lucy."

"Oh yeah," Lucy said rolling her eyes and resting her head in her hands. "The best. I can't walk into the Guild without some insane person asking me out."

"Well," Erza nodded. "It is better when the right person asks."

"I wonder what that's like," Lucy and Levi pouted.

Gray stood and left while the girls and Natsu talked, going by himself to where his partners in crime sat.

"She had a good reason," Cana nodded. "I am in fact, drunk."

"Yeah, what's new?" Laxus rolled his eyes. "Seems like Frozons, next. How are you gonna do it, Gray?"

"About that, I don't think I should," Gray said quickly. "I mean, Juvia would have a fit and try to drown both of us, and she already thinks that Lucy is her romantic rival and they just now started to be friends..."

"Okay," Cana nodded. "Either ask out Lucy or Juvia. Your choice."

"What?" Gray asked worriedly. "Laxus, back me up here, that's insane!"

Laxus just shrugged. "The drunks got a point," He nodded. "I mean, Freed and I are going to dinner tonight because Cana made me ask."

"Loke?" Gray asked desperately.

"I have a girlfriend," Loke shrugged. "It's not that bad of a thing to have."

"You guys are crazy!" Gray yelled standing up and storming away.

"So," Cana said leaning in. "Freed?"

"Hmmm? Did you hear that? I think I hear my grandfather calling for me," Laxus said standing up. "I'll be right there Master!"

"So," Cana asked turning to where Loke was sitting. "And I'm alone. Eh, at least I got a date with Mira later!"


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay, this one is a bit longer. Mostly Gajeel and Levy though. They are my second Fairy Tail otp behind Nalu.**

The following day Lucy willing came back to the Guild, arms locked with Levy with books in their free hands.

Gajeel scoffed at them while sipping on his drink at the bar.

"What's wrong with you?" Natsu asked sitting next to him.

"Look at them, flouncing around together like that," Gajeel sneered.

"Who? Lucy and Levy?" Natsu asked.

"Yeah, just look at Levy," Gajeel said looking over his shoulder as the two girls laughed at a table. "With that short skirt, trying to distract me."

Natsu shrugged. "Women can wear whatever they want; maybe you should just learn self-control."

"Oh yeah, like your pulse didn't jump the second Bunny Girl walked in," Gajeel snorted.

"WE AREN'T TALKING ABOUT ME RIGHT NOW!"

"Gee-hee" Gajeel laughed. "You ask her out yet?"

"You ask Levy out yet?"

Gajeel growled. "Shut up."

"Come on Gajeel; ya know she'll say yes to ya," Natsu laughed. "Just try to be smooth or romantic or whatever."

"What do ya mean?" Gajeel asked. "And where did ya hear those words?"

"I read the back of one of those books Lucy, Levy and Erza are always reading." Natsu smiled at his superiority.

Gajeel looked at Levy and then leaned closer to Natsu. "How do ya be smooth?"

Natsu shrugged. "How would I know it's not like I read the book."

"HOW DOES THAT HELP?"

"Why don't you go grab the new book she got? We'll read the back and figure out how ya should ask her." Natsu said sipping on his drink.

"How the hell am I gonna do that?" Gajeel asked looking at the two girls trading books.

"You two wouldn't mean this book would you?" Mira asked pulling out a book from under her try. "It's Levy's latest romance book. Read carefully you too!" She winked and walked away.

"What's the back say?" Gajeel asked.

"Uh... 'Princess Anna runs into a mysterious stranger who treats her different from all other men she has run into. He quickly forces her out on for a night on the town where he takes more than one thing from her...' What's that mean?" Natsu asked.

"Open it up let's read a little bit," Gajeel commanded.

The boys cracked the book open and got as close to it as they could and began to read.

"The rough stranger pushed her firmly against the ally wall, his hands quickly going up to her hips as his lips crashed into hers..." The two blinked. "What the hell?" Natsu asked taking a break from reading.

"I-I'm not sure, skip forward a few pages," Gajeel answered.

Natsu thumbed a few pages forward and then continued reading allowed. "Princess Anna gasped as he ripped away her delicate silk panties. Quickly his mouth covered her slit as she screamed, wishing she knew his name. Soon his mouth was replaced by his strong calloused finger pumping-"

"I think that's enough!" Mira smiled taking the book back. "Don't want Levy to miss it!"

The two dragon slayers blinked twice then slid away from each other.

"So, uh sounds like the rough approach might work," Natsu said clearing his throat.

Gajeel coughed. "Uh, yeah thanks for that, Flame Brain."

"Hey guys, whats up?" Lucy asked coming up behind Natsu.

"Yeah, you aren't fighting, you two feel okay?" Levy asked. "You're really red, and sweating. Do you have a fever?"

"I'm all right, Shrimp!" Gajeel yelled standing up. "Gonna go train!"

"Y-yeah," Natsu said avoiding Lucy's gaze. "I'm gonna train too!"

And that was how the first day went. The second day offered a strange turn.

"So we'll leave in four days?" Natsu clarified.

"Yup sounds perfect!" Lucy smiled. "What's the mission again?"

"It's real simple," Natsu smiled. "We just gotta go and spend the week house sitting for some old lady and keep her pets alive while we're at it."

"Oh that won't be too difficult," Lucy said. "Although, with you, it might be hard not to destroy something."

"Eh, don't worry about it," Natsu said waving his hand at her. "I've actually started about trying to read; you got a book you can offer?"

"Hey, guys!" Levy smiled standing at the end of the table. "Whats going on?"

"Natsu wants to start reading; you have a book you think he'd like?" Lucy asked.

"Hmmm, well I was reading one last week that might be up his ally-"

"Yo, Shrimp!" Gajeel said walking up to her.

"Oh, hi Gajeel!" Levy smiled.

"You're going out on a date with me tonight, got it?" Gajeel asked, his face a bright red.

"Oh," Levy blushed. "Okay, sound like fun."

"Yeah, it will be. I-I'll meet you here." Gajeel said before walking away.

"Sorry, Natsu," Lucy said quickly. "We'll get you a book later, right now we need to find something for Levy to wear tonight!"

They quickly grabbed Erza, Juvia and Mira then ran to the nearest shop.

Gajeel sat down across from Natsu with a smug smile. Soon Gray, Cana, Laxus and Loke joined.

"Well, it looks like all of us got a date before you, Natsu," Laxus smirked.

Natsu shrugged. "That wasn't smooth at all."

"Na, but it was rough, and it got me a beautiful girl," Gajeel smirked from ear to year. "Tell me what sitting on your ass has gotten you?"

"SHUT THE HELL UP THAT'S WHAT IT'S GOTTEN ME!" Natsu yelled throwing a flaming fist at Gajeel's jaw.

"HEY, WATCH THE FACE! SOME OF US HAVE DATES TONIGHT!"

"GUILD BRAWL!" Cana yelled.

And that was the end of the second day.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/n at the end this time... Last chapter!**

Natsu sat at the bar snacking on a small fire while Mira cleaned classes and cups.

"Has your plan gone well?" Mira asked.

"You could say that," Natsu smirked. "Gotta wait to see how Gray turns out."

Behind them, everyone sat at the table together. Lucy was talking to Erza, Juvia, and Levy while the small blue haired mage had an arm wrapped around Gajeel's. The four trouble makers were sitting on the other end.

"You gotta do something," Cana whispered to Gray.

"Yeah, don't puss out more than Natsu!" Laxus added.

"You must ask either Miss. Lucy or Juvia for a date," Loke smirked. "You must pick."

"Yeah, then fucking commit, come on!" Cana said pushing him forward.

He sat closer now to the girl's side of the table and laughed nervously. "So, uh... Lucy?"

"Yeah, Gray?" Lucy asked happily.

"I... uh..." His eyes flicked from Lucy's who were doing nothing but looking at her close friend's, to Juvia, who were in the forms of hearts, and the three pairs that he had been in cahoots with for over a week. "I heard that Natsu wanted to start reading. You got any idea why?"

"Oh, no idea at all. Maybe he just wants to try something new," Lucy shrugged.

"Or try something you love," Levy giggled.

"Oh," Lucy laughed. "I doubt that."

"Hey Juvia," Gray cut in. "I was wondering if you wanted to go out on a date tonight?"

Juvia froze then fell to the floor. A few seconds later she popped back up and smiled larger than she ever had. "Why, yes, Gray Juvia would love too!"

Natsu smirked at the bar. "Yup sounds like it worked."

"They really should learn not to underestimate you, shouldn't they?" Mira giggled.

"Nah, it's better when they do," Natsu said stretching. "If ya don't mind I got some minds to blow."

"Have fun," Mira waved. "And thanks for everything."

"Yo Luce?" Natsu yelled walking over to the table. He walked with a confidence they had only seen him have when going into a battle.

"Yeah, Natsu?" Lucy smiled.

"..." Natsu stopped in front of the end of the table and blinked at her. The entire table was staring intently.

"Are you okay Natsu?" Lucy asked.

"Heh, yeah, you're just so beautiful that I forgot my pick-up line!" Natsu laughed scratching the back of his head. Everyone at the table, save for Lucy, had their jaw's hit the table and their eyes disappear in gray.

Lucy giggled. "Natsu, you're so sweet."

He smiled and held his hand out to her. "You ready for our date tonight?"

"Yup," Lucy smiled taking his hand as he pulled her to his side.

"Wha..."

"You think I would pine over Luce for over a month and not do something?" Natsu laughed. "I thought I was supposed to be impulsive."

"Yeah, and you think I'm stupid enough not to notice when someone likes me?" Lucy asked.

"I think they might be idiots," Natsu nodded.

"WHAT THE HELL?" Gray demanded.

"Well, if I gotta spell it out for you," Natsu smirked, his hand going to the small of Lucy's back. "Little less than a month ago I asked Lucy out."

"And I said yes," She smiled. "But he said we needed to keep acting single because he had a plan."

"That, might I add," Natsu added. "Went perfectly."

"WHAT THE DAMN?" Laxus yelled.

"Well, ya see, you were all so pathetically single," Natsu smirked. "And I knew there was no way you had the level of confidence I do to just ask someone out."

"Oh please," Lucy rolled her eyes as her arms wrapped around his neck. "Your face was redder than Erza's hair when you asked me. And then you thought I said no and started to talk a mile a minute."

"Eh, details, the point is I asked my Lucy out before any of you did and I had the balls to do it on my own," Natsu smiled toothily. "So I figured the only way to put a fire under you idiots was to be even more pathetic than you guys!"

"NO WAY YOU TRICKED US ALL!" Cana yelled.

"Calm down, sweety," Mira said putting a hand on her shoulder.

"See? This way you're all with who you're meant to be!" Natsu said pointing to them with his free hand. "Laxus and Freed. Cana and Mira. Gajeel and Levy. And lastly Gray and Juvia. I knew you'd puss out by the way."

"WHAT THE HELL?" Gray asked again, more enraged than last time.

"What about the letter from Jellal," Erza asked. "You didn't-"

"That one was dumb luck," Natsu laughed. "I was actually planning to talk to Mystogan before Luce told me the real one sent you a letter."

"Thanks for the help, Loke." Lucy smiled.

"Anything for you Miss. Lucy," Loke smiled standing up. "Now, if you don't mind, I have a date with Aries." With that, he disappeared.

"HE WAS IN ON IT TOO?" Cana yelled outraged.

"I needed to make sure you three behaved when I wasn't around. Who could I trust more than one of Lucy's Spirits?" Natsu laughed. "Oh, and by the way, Gajeel, when I came up here a bit ago and said hi to my girl? _That_ was smooth."

"YOU JACKASS!"

"So, Luce," Natsu said turning his attention to his girlfriend. "Book store then your place?"

"Yup, I'll make dinner," Lucy smiled.

"WHATS HAPPENING?" Gray yelled.

"NATSU FUCKING PLAYED US THAT'S WHAT HAPPENING!" Cana answered.

"Wait, do you actually want to start reading?" Levy asked.

"Oh yeah," Natsu smiled toothy while guiding Lucy away. "A book I ordered just came in. The Kama Sutra!"

Everyone at the table was taken aback, their jaws going to the table again while their eyes disappeared and a sweat drop appeared.

"Juvia does not understand, what is the Kama Sutra?"

 **Hello all! So there is the end! Now I had originally planned for a different ending when I first started writing this a day or two ago. Everything would be the same until this chapter, basically, Gray was going to ask out Lucy, then Juvia would promptly try to drown both of them. I'd pick back up a few days later when everything has calmed down, Lucy and Juvia are friends and Gray and Juvia are dating. Leaving Lucy sad and long and Natsu hitting his head on the table. The four trouble makers would be sitting alone at a table together sulking that their plan didn't work when Mira would come up and tell them why it didn't work. "He knew that she would say no, or that it wouldn't go past one date..." Then some stranger from town would come in and ask Lucy out. She would begin to answer when Natsu would loose it, pick the guy up and throw him out of the Guild. After a bit of yelling from Lucy about how rude that was Natsu would finally confess that he liked her and they would go out. Then the story would go back to Mira and the other four. Mira would continue saying "You needed someone niether of them knew. A real threat." She would then threaten them and say that they shouldn't stick thier noises where they didn't belong, becuase that was her job.**

 **That was the ending I was planning to go with, though I also toyed with the idea of Lucy finally caving and asking Natsu out, right when he was about to ask her. Leaving the four to smack thier heads at the giant waiste of time they just spent.**

 **However, as I was finishing this today, I thought "What better then Natsu being the evil genious?" Everyone thinks that he is so stupid and only focus on fighting, but to win as many fights as he has he needs to be smart enough to find a way to beat his opponet, leaving him anything but stupid. So when he sees how stupid and misirbal his Guild Mates are making him how else can he fix it but to play dumb? All he does is play dumb, but he can't play when it comes to Lucy!**

 **I hope you enjoyed! Please review! Now, the story is done, unless someone really wants another part to it (and they are specific about what they want, like Lucy and Natsu going home everyday and laughing at thier Guild mates, or bits from everyone's dates) I would be more than happy to write them! I have two more weeks of break left then college starts back up so let me know quick while I still have time to get them out in a timly manner!**


End file.
